What limits us?

So why the blog title... and will I share (my view!) on the answer...

I'm a firm believer that it is not what happens to us that defines who we are but the way we act (or react) to the things that have occurred. If we purely go by what happens to us we run the risk of perceiving ourselves as 'victims of circumstance/environment' and this empowers our environment to control us. If we however accept what has happened and then choose how we act (or react), we then take control and empower ourselves. These are just words that are easy to write, the proof is in living them. This is not to say we should not empathise with people when 'bad' things happen, we are human. Open any newspaper and you'll read stories about war, rape, murder.. you'll also read stories on heroics, whether it is someone wrestling down a gun man, or someone's own conquering of a fear, illness or other misfortune. I'd also suggest not reading the stories about the celebrity gossip and scandal... there are better ways to spend your time, such as focusing on your own life rather than theirs...

Therefore the answer to the question as to what limits us... it is ourselves...

My experiences have so far shown me that whether we look at the work environment or the personal environment the barriers we usually say prevent us from doing things are those we create ourselves. All of these are excuses.. let's be clear on that.

On the personal side people will often say:

• 'I don't have the time'. We all have the same amount of time.. 24 hours a day! It is how we choose to use it that counts... It is not about having the time, it is about making the time.
• 'I don't have the money'. Perhaps a trickier one, but whether it is getting fit, spending time with the family, having a holiday... these things can be done on a budget. How much do many people spend on alcohol, cigarettes, pizza and fast food, smart phones, designer clothes etc a year.. add it up.. it is a lot. Yes there are many families who live below the poverty line, let's acknowledge that, money can make things easier (or harder) however it isn't the barrier people make it into being.
• 'I don't know where to begin'. With the access to Internet, free public libraries there is a wealth of information out there. To get a successful result takes planning and time, so do some research. It stimulates the mind, it empowers you to make your own decisions and be in charge of your own destiny rather than just be a victim and do what you're told.
• 'I'll do it tomorrow, next week etc'. back to time again.. most likely the number 1 excuse!

On the work side my experience has shown people can be fixated with rank, grade, job titles, job descriptions, roles & responsibilities and use this as reasons not to do things. I've also done this.. most of us have, however over the last 10 years I've also pushed at my own barriers and taken action, made decisions, acted at a level above my own rank, job title and found that people will follow and not question so long as you act with confidence, integrity and at least a modicum of knowledge! The people who are successful CEOs were not born to being a CEO, many of them started as cashiers and other roles, however the successful people excel at stepping outside the boundaries of their current roles and demonstrating that they can work at the next level. An interesting thought there... just don't get too carried away!

I've been gifted, some would say lucky, over the last few years of my career to be at the right time and the right place.. luck does play a part. The result is a rapid move up the corporate ladder. I had a choice in January 2007 of joining one of two companies, a small consultancy (which is my career background), or taking a change and leading a small internal application development team of ~10 staff. I chose the latter option because it was different, a new experience, and I wanted to see if I could do it.

Now 3-4 years on, whether through hard work, luck, talent, timing and likely all of these and more, I find myself running a global team of ~600 staff for the same organisation. I'd never have guessed or hoped this would have happened. I'm learning a lot about myself, my strengths and my growth areas each day. Am I qualified to do this role, do I have the experience... does it matter? To me no it does not, so long as I am not sinking beneath the waves and I am using the opportunity to learn and grow then this is an opportunity not to throw away. Do I have fears? are there times I think I can't do it? when I make my own self-imposed barriers.. of course there are.. Do my team see this, perhaps, perhaps not.. However by reviewing my perspective I (almost!) always find that the things that I believe are limiting me are just in my mind. By changing the angle with which I am viewing the situation I can find a way to move forward...

So my message to anyone who reads this blog, is not to choose to be a 'victim' but instead to 'choose' how you act to the circumstances around you. Stop making excuses that you know, deep down, are excuses that you can overcome, and instead take control, take control of your lives, your surroundings, help those around you to step up or..... if necessary, if those around you are holding you back, change who you associate with, or at least take a break from some of those that have a negative influence on you.

We each have two destinies... the one we are living, and the one we choose...

I ask you to choose...

And acknowledgment and thanks to my wife for being so supportive during the last few years. The career journey mentioned above coincided with meeting my (now) wife. Maybe she is my good luck charm! Irrespective, she has supported me and helped me to demonstrate I have the 'courage to lead'. To my wife, thank you for sharing this journey!